Tom & Rob · Every other Monday
Two mates. A bit of everything.
Comedic chaos.
Films, music, nostalgia, everyday life — and whatever happens next.
Whats wrong Mcvities, are you and Jaffa ok?
McVitie’s has some explaining to do as Jaffa Cookies promise the world and deliver disappointment. Plus birthday Maltesers, cinema wish lists, Game Boy nostalgia and a backwards TV theme quiz.
New around here?
Start with these.
A few first listens, picked by Tom and Rob.
Say words, Eddie Vedder
Why start here? Well, it's a prime example of Tom giving Rob a quiz that is nigh on impossible. Those of you that know the name Eddie Vedder, will understand why lyrics and understanding could be an issue here.
Why ADHD Isn’t A Superpower
We nearly didn't release an episode, Tom couldn't handle it even though he was the one saying no. In the end he explains where his head is at and sets the score straight on ADHD.
Why Is There A Giant Knife In The Daycare?
Sometimes we just have to watch TV and in this case, the Tweenies had a knife crime epidemic!
Your questionable taste. Our next episode?
Suggest a snack, put a 90s song to the test, or ask us a question.
The back catalogue
Before Smartphones, we read Toilet Duck
Episode 91 is here! Tom and Rob tackle restaurant bill dodging, irritating influencers and forgotten nostalgia before putting Jaffa Cake Digestives to the taste test. Plus, can Rob identify ten classic video games from their sound effects alone? Throw in some questionable 90s music and the usual ridiculous arguments, and you've got another chaotic episode of The Variety Show.
One Pringle or Four? This Is Apparently an Argument
A Transformers cinema trip causes age-rating chaos, Fallout Pringles disappoint, and Rob wants six-hour Lord of the Rings films. Throw in baffling movie reviews and cars that won’t stop interfering, and Episode 90 has plenty to argue about.
Microwave Chips, Movie Swearing and a Weaponised Fart
Tap-to-pay panic, questionable PG swearing and the tragic decline of microwave chips collide in Episode 89. Tom and Rob tackle Sky Mobile’s Roy Keane advert, Nintendo scalpers, the new Zelda remake and a Foley challenge featuring trains, whales and a fart transformed into warp speed. There’s also a franchise-age quiz spanning Shrek, Pokémon, Jurassic Park, Alien and Star Trek, before Pretty Green
Amazon, Adverts and 90s Dance Anthems
How much space are old TV adverts still taking up in your brain? This week, Rob faces 10 real songs behind classic advert parodies. Plus a £750 win that becomes an Amazon Switch 2 nightmare, a Lidl-powered Dad Win and two 90s dance anthems fighting for survival.
The One Where the Fire Marshal Started a Fire
This week, The Variety Show is doing things a little differently. Rob and Tom aren't even in the same room, the audio has had a few adventures of its own, and instead of the usual games, taste tests and nostalgia, they're answering five questions designed to reveal far more than anyone really needed to know.
It Wasn't Moby
It wasn’t Moby. That much we can tell you.
The Summer Crime Walkabout
What happens when you mix a true crime documentary, a walking tour, local history and two middle-aged idiots who can’t stay on topic? You get The Summer Crime Walkabout.
We Tried Recreating Movie Themes With Melody Pops
The Variety Show Podcast returns with one of our most ridiculous episodes yet as Rob and Tom tackle everything from podcast SEO frustrations to Melody Pops musical disasters.
Why Is There A Giant Knife In The Daycare?
The Variety Show is back and this episode somehow manages to cover football, children’s TV, floppy disks and fake hazelnuts in the same conversation.
We Have Seen The Chipmunk's Beaver
Tom and Rob are back for Episode 82 and, after the emotional ADHD special, normal service has resumed.
Why ADHD Isn’t A Superpower
No usual chaos. No Rob. No ridiculous debates (well… mostly). Just Tom, out on a late-night walk, talking honestly about something that’s shaped far more of life than he ever realised: ADHD.
Say words, Eddie Vedder
Barclays tech support apparently runs on spreadsheets. Pearl Jam may or may not be speaking English. One child becomes emotionally invested in the tragic fate of fictional people who “didn’t want to die.” Just another normal week on The Variety Show.